RELATIONSHIPS are the cornerstones of our existence because no man is an island unto himself where he can live alone by himself. A major part of our life is dependent on our relationships without parents, spouse, friend, children, colleagues, and which demand ultimate commitment and responsibility to build a lasting and meaningful bond. All of us desire to lead a happy life and bring satisfaction to ourselves and to our loved ones but something stops us which prevents us from being happy. What is it that creates this gap between our being and where we want to reach? Here the author suggests some qualities which we may have and if not, then we need to build them in ourselves.
Firstly we should accept ourselves for what we are. If we keep criticising a person for his wrong deeds, the person develops a low self-esteem and may lose interest in the skills that he possesses. If we try to highlight his strong points and channelise them towards improvement, he will work towards improving himself. This, the author has termed, as ‘positive growthology’. When we start accepting ourselves for our faults and mistakes, we develop the same attitude towards others also. Thus accept yourself so as to be able to accept others too. We must develop acceptance of our loved ones, express our unconditional love and then suggest changes. Simply sermonising or forcing the changes would not do any good.
This book cannot provide solution for every problem that may arise in a relationship, but it does help to bring about the realisation how small changes in our approach towards life can bring about huge transformations. Since happiness is a state of mind, create the states which help in keeping you happy and thereby the people around who would be happy to see you happy. -MG
(Macmillan Publishers India, Ltd, 2/10 Ansari Road, Daryaganj, New Delhi-110002.)